KG Reports: “I guess some people are just lazy!”

Yup. You heard it here first. Ellin is lazy. I’ve been telling her to get off her butt and write something because she might lose her fan base. And do you know what she said?  She said, “I can’t believe anyone is still really interested in what’s happening here. I mean, I’ve been through every ‘first,’ so what’s the big deal?” Really? I thought she was so much more clever than that.

And then it happened. Ellin had some “action” last week and learned how to navigate the Israeli health system on a more personal level. . .  At least when it comes to learning the ins and outs of the local hospital’s ER. Now don’t go getting your knickers in a twist. Everything’s cool and she told me that it was actually a rather interesting experience.

Really no biggie, but it turned out that a virus kind of lodged itself into her breathing and she thought (and her doc) thought it was pneumonia. But of course, it was really wasn’t anything like that . . . just some “Israeliasthma” is what I think she called it. Not sure what that means., though.  What could it mean?  It was loud? Hmmm. Maybe. She was sounding like a Great Dane rather than a Schnoodle or a YappyTerrior. Insistent? Well, that could be. It didn’t seem to let up for a minute. Heavy-handed? Well, she said it did feel like a one-ton gorilla had taken up residence on her chest, and we can assume their mitts are pretty heavy. In the end, I’m not sure what she meant. Could it be something as simple as her body finally getting acclimated to all the new pollens and spores that are endlessly spewed from the fields across from her house as they combine with the winter’s rain and coat everything in a brown, earthy film?  JillfromJerusalem told me that it seems to take new Olim about a year until new allergies and irritants strike them and that would be just about right as far as timing. You think that actually makes sense? Naaaahhhhhhh. Neither do I.

Anyway, from what I could sniff out after her adventure, Zoe and Ellin went to Ellin’s doctor (who has the most adorable, little weinerdogpuppy). Dr. Kazur decided Ellin was a nut for even driving to the office and called for an ambulance to take her to the ER. That kind of pissed off Ellin, who kept insisting between wild gasps for air that she was perfectly fine to drive herself. No surprise that the doctor prevailed and, according to Ellin, the two cutest guys from MagenDavidAdom came and put her on a stretcher that sat up like a chair. Her momentary enjoyment was cut short, however, when the stretcher failed to fit into the elevator if both of the medics tried to accompany her. Good thing that Ellin’s claustrophobia didn’t kick in or she would have pushed the “down” button, jumped out, and made her way down the stairs to meet the stretcher on the main floor. It is a testament to how doggone crappy she must have felt that she didn’t even blink. Eventually they got her to the ER and the rest of the day went as follows (or so I’ve been told) . . . . intravenous, cute male nurse. Tylenol. Another cute male nurse. Ride to the X ray room (accompanied by a  really cute male radiography nurse), a few more pills,  being the subject of the afternoon’s rounds (where Ellin met one of her former Russian/Hebrew Ulpan mates!), visits by several very cute doctors, an inhalation therapy (she doesn’t remember who gave that one to her) followed by a prompt discharge after 4 hours. Caveat emptor: You do not get a ride out of the hospital in a wheelchair in Israel. Once you sign the papers it’s up to you to find your way outta there!

Later that day, as I snuggled next to Ellin (she smelled like the Vet’s office, so I simply used my poodle noodle to extrapolate where she had been), I gazed at her with those endless ebony pools of mush, aka known as my eyeballs, and asked her what it was like. She said, without hesitation, that the hospital has the cutest male nurses  (sense a pattern????) and that it made no difference to anyone if the patients, doctors, nurses, visitors, etc. were Israeli Jews, Arabs, Christians, or whatevers. The ER is just a great equalizer. Her biggest comment, however, was on how amazing Zoe was. Zoe translated and advocated for her, rubbed her back, and made sure she had enough to drink. A little role reversal, I believe.

Meanwhile, back at the poodlepad, not having any idea what was going on, but rather perplexed, perturbed, and pissed that I was so unceremoniously left alone all day, I decided to redocorate. When stuck for ideas, I find that turning to the garbage bag for inspiration  makes for excellent decorating ideas. So, to better make use of the copious time I had alone in the apartment, I decided to try my hand at imitating Jackson Pollock. You can only imagine Ellin and Zoe’s delight at my creativeness upon their return home. As for the artistic merit of my work, Ellin says the jury is still out.

Guess you just can’t please some people.

Happy Tu B’Shvat (Happy birthday to the trees!).

 

KG Out.

Aren't I regal?

Aren’t I regal?

 

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10 thoughts on “KG Reports: “I guess some people are just lazy!”

  1. Ellen,Glad to hear that you’re doing okay……..That’s Israel for ya……..Ask my daughter and granddaughter what it feels like……….Feel better………Take care of yourself…………Tell Zoe that she should be very proud of herself………..Your poodle is a pip!Happy Tu B’Shavat!Be well,Carole

    Date: Thu, 16 Jan 2014 09:45:26 +0000 To: savtacarole@msn.com

  2. Update: New email address: savtacarole34@gmail.com.

    From: savtacarole@msn.com To: comment+pytyu8cx8gslrk9ok2f7zf@comment.wordpress.com Subject: RE: [New post] KG Reports: I guess some people are just lazy! Date: Thu, 16 Jan 2014 08:52:23 -0500

    Ellen,Glad to hear that you’re doing okay……..That’s Israel for ya……..Ask my daughter and granddaughter what it feels like……….Feel better………Take care of yourself…………Tell Zoe that she should be very proud of herself………..Your poodle is a pip!Happy Tu B’Shavat!Be well,Carole

    Date: Thu, 16 Jan 2014 09:45:26 +0000 To: savtacarole@msn.com

  3. Oops! Spelling error……..Tu B’Shevat.

    From: savtacarole@msn.com To: comment+pytyu8cx8gslrk9ok2f7zf@comment.wordpress.com Subject: RE: [New post] KG Reports: I guess some people are just lazy! Date: Thu, 16 Jan 2014 08:52:57 -0500

    Update: New email address: savtacarole34@gmail.com.

    From: savtacarole@msn.com To: comment+pytyu8cx8gslrk9ok2f7zf@comment.wordpress.com Subject: RE: [New post] KG Reports: I guess some people are just lazy! Date: Thu, 16 Jan 2014 08:52:23 -0500

    Ellen,Glad to hear that you’re doing okay……..That’s Israel for ya……..Ask my daughter and granddaughter what it feels like……….Feel better………Take care of yourself…………Tell Zoe that she should be very proud of herself………..Your poodle is a pip!Happy Tu B’Shavat!Be well,Carole

    Date: Thu, 16 Jan 2014 09:45:26 +0000 To: savtacarole@msn.com

  4. Dear KG, we were all very concerned to hear that Ellin had been a bit ‘under the weather’ but glad she got some eye candy out of it, Male nurses are a bit dishy on the whole, saw a few while Geoff was in hospital a couple of months ago. Happy memories!. Please give Ellin a loving lick she is very special as you know and we think of her a lot. Our Christmas season is over here, and a bit of a one it was, we had the most tremendous storms resulting in bad flooding for many people – not us thankfully- we only had water coming through the roof and down the top stairs which was kept under control by a few buckets and thick towels, worst thing was a 24hour power cut on Christmas Eve with everyone anxious as to how they would cook the Christmas dinner next day but thankfully power restored for Christmas Day so all was well and we had a lovely family get-together at son Tim’s place. Daughter Alison came down the previous day and had a meal with us in the evening we cooked on a camping stove and ate by candlelight, rather nice and apart from being a bit cold a few extra woollies took care of that, we had an enjoyable evening. Geoff continues to recover from whatever the infection was that laid him low – obviously ‘a lot of it about’ if it even reached you, he looks a little pale and wobbly but if spring and summer arrives as usual this year he will soon pink up!. I am well and still very much missing my little Daisy dog, Poppy dog does too, have shown her photos of you and she perked up no end, good job you are not nearer else you would have another adoring follower!”. So glad that Zoe is nearby to help you keep an eye on Ellin, keep up the good work Love and licks Sheila.

  5. Well it’s about time KG hit the keys. Saw three poodles in NYC last night who were very beautiful but not as Regal as KG. Hope you’ve recovered from your israelasthma. Great job Zoey. Lol

  6. Ellin how are you now?
    Did you have to pay?
    I am struggling with Obama care that more than doubled. My monthly health insurance pay.
    Your puddle is great make me feel nostalgic about blue my medium size puddle .
    She died in 2006
    I am renewing my visa hopefully this week .
    All my love
    Rai

  7. Ellin, so glad to know that you are alright – and wonderful that Zoe was able to be such a big help. And yes, Rocco is quite regal. Take care xo

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